What do all of these famous couples have in common?
I'm sure you guessed it, all of those husbands are cheats. What else do you notice? That all of the women are slim, attractive, sexy ladies.
So why do so many 'men' make the decision to cheat on their beautiful wives with strangers? And why do they always so strongly deny it, and then eventually confess, and then make excuses? These are some of the most beautiful women on the planet. Are they jealous that they get all of the attention? Do they crave to be the big strong cave man? Here are just some of the quotes by the previously mentioned 'men' with regards to their inappropriate antics.
Ashton Kutcher: "When you ASSUME to know that which you know nothing of you make an ASS out of U and ME"
Vernon Kay: It was "harmless banter". "I've only done this with four or five girls and I've known them all well — they've been friends or work colleagues". " I can't tell you why I do it. It just happens and the stupid and daft person in me lets it carry on."
Ashley Cole: "I've made mistakes. I've just got to live with it."
Tiger Woods: "I was unfaithful. I had affairs. I cheated." "I've been irresponsible and selfish."
Wayne Rooney: "It was the kind of mistake you make when you're young and foolish."
Jason Manford: "I have only myself to blame. I have never felt so low." "There were ten or 12 people flirting and then with a few it went over the line. We would start off flirty, then innuendo and then a bit saucy. It was just nice to have some interaction I suppose."
So as I was about to begin my research into all of this, I turn to trusty Google and begin to type 'why..' and as the second most popular suggestion result, after 'why is the sky blue?', was 'why do men cheat?'. Obviously this is a commonly asked question.
So here are some of the top reasons (excuses) men cheat:
Men crave sexual “variety” - long-term relationships seem to suck the sex drive out of many women.
She has cheated on him - For many men, this is the only way to get back at their cheating girlfriends and even the score.
It's challenging and exciting - Some men simply cannot leave behind the thrill of the hunt, the chase and the conquest.
They can get away with it - "What eyes don't see, the heart doesn't feel,"
Ego boost - When in long-term relationships, men may begin to question their sexual marketability
They re 'allowed' - women are quick to forgive men for their unfaithful behaviour. Maybe it's their fear of being alone, or that women are simply the more merciful ones of the human species. Some women might even blame themselves for their men's infidelities, and take steps to improve their relationships. The fact is that many women let their men get away with murder.
The thing that annoys me most about all of those 'men' is that they promised to remain in a committed relationship or marriage, and some even had children, or who's partners were pregnant at the time of their infidelity. They apologise, come out with the same old excuses, try and guilt trip the woman into blaming her, and then almost always, the female forgives him and takes him back. Possibly for history to repeat itself. Is he really sorry? Does he really mean it when he promises he won't do it again? Or is he just a sociopath?
Sociopath (definition: characterised by a lack of regard for the moral standards in the local culture. There is a marked inability to get along with others or abide by societal rules.) Aka: Moral Insanity.
Common features of descriptions of the behavior of sociopaths:
- Superficial charm
- Manipulative - They appear to be charming, yet are covertly hostile and domineering
- Pathological Lying - Has no problem lying coolly and easily and it is almost impossible for them to be truthful on a consistent basis.
- Lack of remorse, shame or guilt - A deep seated rage from the past is repressed, is at their core. Does not see others around them as people, but only as targets and opportunities.
- Shallow emotions - When they show what seems to be warmth, joy, love and compassion it is more feigned and serves an ulterior motive.
- Incapacity for love
- Need for stimulation - Verbal outbursts and physical punishments are normal. Promiscuity is common.
- Callousness/lack of empathy - Unable to empathize with the pain of their victims
- Irresponsibility/unreliability - Not concerned about wrecking others' lives and dreams. Oblivious or indifferent to the devastation they cause. Does not accept blame themselves, but blames others, even for acts they obviously committed.
- Lack of realistic life plan - Tends to move around a lot or makes all encompassing promises for the future, poor work ethic but exploits others effectively.
- Contemptuous of those who seek to understand them
- Does not perceive that anything is wrong with them
- Goal of enslavement of their victim
- Exercises despotic control over every aspect of the victim's life
- Has an emotional need to justify their crimes and therefore needs their victim's affirmation (respect, gratitude and love)
- Incapable of real human attachment to another
- Extreme narcissism
- Repeated acts that could lead to arrest
- Conning for pleasure or profit, repeated lying, or the use of aliases
- Failure to plan ahead or being impulsive
- Repeated assaults on others
- Reckless when it comes to their or others safety
- Poor work behavior or failure to honour financial obligations
- Exhibit a Jekyll and Hyde personality
People with this disorder appear to be charming at times, and make relationships, but to them, these are relationships in name only. They are ended whenever necessary or when it suits them, and the relationships are without depth or meaning, including marriages. They seem to have an innate ability to find the weakness in people, and are ready to use these weaknesses to their own ends through deceit, manipulation, or intimidation, and gain pleasure from doing so. They appear to be incapable of any true emotions, from love to shame to guilt. They rarely are able to have jobs that last for any length of time, as they become easily bored, instead needing constant change. They live for the moment, forgetting the past, and not planning the future, not thinking ahead what consequences their actions will have.
The most important thing to know is that a sociopath has a brain that does not work right. In fact, he is missing a part of his brain. More specifically, he is missing one of the building blocks of his personality. This is why it cannot be treated or fixed or cured. The part of his brain that is missing shapes his conscience, and because it is missing, he does not have one. The sociopath does not feel guilt, remorse or shame like the rest of us feel when we do something bad or wrong. He is not capable of feeling guilt or shame because he is missing that piece of his personality. It also means he does not have the boundaries, restraints on his behaviour or impulse control that the rest of us do so he will do things that are outrageous, things that normal personalities would never consider doing.
So if you think that this reminds you of your partner, do something about it.